A Christmas Tinkle

I have written a new play for the Sandhills Theatre Arts Renaissance School (STARS) which performs on Thursday, December 17th 2009. This would be the 3rd or 4th play/musical I have written and the 3rd done at the STARS charter school. The show is rather simple in that it is only about 20 minutes long and broken up into 4 parts, taking the form of a classic serial play and performed as 4 interludes during the middle school's winter performance.

I find that I have a love/hate relationship with witting in that I know that I can write but I hate to sit down and actually do it. I find that I can talk for hours about ideas and thoughts but it takes me forever to write those thoughts down. My attention span is not conducive to holding on to a thought long enough to write it down on paper. But I digress. Here is the story plot:

It is the day before Christmas and Santa and the elves are preparing the toys for loading onto the sled. The play begins with a celebration and, of course, the obligatory "ho, ho, ho" from Santa. After getting the update in regards to the toy preparations, he then gets the update on the reindeer. All seems to be going fine until he asks for the list of those who have been naughty and nice. Rather than the traditional list of names printed on the big scroll of paper he has used for hundreds of years; her is presented with a PDA by one of the elves. The elf explains that they have been getting a lot of "bad press" about that waste involved with printing the traditional list on paper and with everyone "going green", this is the result. Even though Santa doesn't know how he will ever learn this new technology, he decides that he has no choice and is reminded that "you can't stop progress."

A letter then arrives from the EPA and the Committee on Global Warming informing him that "due to his reindeer's gas emissions", he is prohibited from using them during this years toy delivery and that he will be forced to find an alternative. Santa laments the "progress" he is being faced with and wonders why, if it is in fact "progress", that it seems to be doing nothing but making his life more difficult. He then gathers his elves, reads them the letter and talks about the importance of tradition. An elf by the name of Tinkle shows Santa a magazine he has just been reading. The magazine is a catalog of new sleds and shows him the "Wonderland Hybrid" that has just come out. It is better for the environment, gets great gas mileage and doesn't use any reindeer. Santa declares that this may be their only hope.

At the dealership, Santa asks to see this new sled and the salesman tells him that it is their most popular model. In fact, a lot of people have been trading in their old "clunker" sleds for this new hybrid. He then brings out the sled; which is extremely small. Santa has no idea how he is going to fit in the thing let alone deliver toys to all the girls and boy in the world. Having no choice Santa relents only to be told that you have to drive it like a car. The problem...Santa doesn't have a license! After all, reindeer drive his sleigh. He is then told that reindeer are thing of the past and this new technology is the future and of course, "you can't stop progress". Santa, in a fit of rage, declares "how's this for progress...Christmas is canceled!"

The last scene takes place back at the North pole as Santa arrives after having visited the dealership. Everyone is anxious to hear how things went and to see the new sleigh. Santa tells everyone that he is canceling Christmas. At that point Tinkle raises his hand and tells everyone the he may found a way to save Christmas. He takes his place at the center of the room, unfolds a chart showing Santa's sleigh being pulled by reindeer with pouches on the hind ends. He explains that he has invented a device that goes over the hind end of the reindeer, captures their gas emissions, converts it into energy and finally the energy is released as a holiday scented mist over the land; effectively saving Christmas. And there is much rejoicing.

I always want to make a statement when writing or directing a show that speaks to larger issues facing the world. While I try my best not to "preach" a point of view, I want an audience to think about the message. Here we have an obvious play that addresses global warming but more importantly how regulation will effect our lives. While some regulation may be positive, we must stop and think about the hardships they may bring. Do the hardships out way the benefits. What is the price we are willing to pay to give up tradition? Is progress for the sake of progress a good thing or a bad thing? Are you willing to pay higher energy prices which might mean that your family may have to go without in the HOPE that it will help the environment without a guarantee?

Theatre's roots are in teaching. It has been used as a teaching tool since its inception. Thank goodness that I have found a school that understands this concept. I am blest to have to opportunity to work with teachers who understand what the arts are truly about: A tool to help children find an inner genius and to use that genius to develop their talent in all areas of their schooling and lives.

On a sad note. I will never get to see the show performed for an audience as I have a two-show day of "A Christmas Carol" on Thursday. I will be at the school for a run-through Thursday morning and then I will leave it in their hands. I have no doubt that they will meet every one of my expectations.